Desperately Need Some Accountability
I have been secretly drinking spirits (vodka, gin, whisky) for the last 6 years. I started sleeping in a separate room from my wife around that time (due to my snoring) and slipped into a habit of staying up late, streaming tv series and drinking. My unhealthy relationship with alcohol started in my teens. In my early thirties, when the kids were born, I cut back dramatically and rarely drank at all. My relationship with my wife is in a good place, despite sleeping in different rooms. I work in healthcare and I am deeply ashamed that I have allowed my drinking to spiral out of control like this. My hypocrisy hangs heavily on me. I feel that I can't tell my wife, as she is struggling with her own issues, at the moment. It would be very difficult for me to attend meetings, as I regularly appear in media as part of my work.
I need to be accountable to someone in order to stay on track. I desperately want to recover from this. I have made so many attempts and broken so many promises to myself. So, this is Day One. I'm committing to give an honest account of my attempt to remain sober.