Originally Posted by Spiderweb

So sorry you are going through this. It is terrible and so painful. I remember finding my XAH’s hidden bottles and feeling like I had walked into a living nightmare, slowly realizing the worst- case scenario had come true. Addiction is ugly and cruel and, like SparkleKitty said, he started to get upset/defensive only once you brought up his drinking. You are doing absolutely nothing wrong but you are coming between him and his drinking and addicts will do anything to keep drinking, including losing their kind, loving spouses. As much as it hurts, you are doing the right thing by letting him go. He is being upfront with you that he will not change. The good part of this, it might be hard to realize, is that he is not wasting years of your life in denial, promising to change, breaking promises and keeping you on the merry go round as he spirals downward. Some of us have been there. Sounds like you are closer to your family again, no children together- you can start over. You have a lot to offer the world and there are good, kind, healthy people out there to share it with. This is good place and you’ll realize you’re not alone.