I've been thinking about your situation, Five. You can tell me to go kick rocks if none of the below applies:
Marriage is a two way street. There really needs to be some give and take with both parties.
I understand that your wife does not want you to quit alcohol. There are a lot of things that I personally do not want in my life either. For example: I don't want to have an issue with alcohol. The reality is that I do have an issue and therefore I had to address it. She doesn't have to like what you are doing but it is going to be helpful for you if she accepts what you are doing. My husband was not all that happy with me when I quit this go round either. He has seen me quit many many times. I took his feelings out of the equation and set about to get sober. I didnt care if he believed me or not or if he supported me or not. I needed to get healthy. Almost 5 months sober now and he is 100% on board and proud of the road I am walking.
Spending 3 hours with a group of people, rather than 6 hours, seems like enough time to hang out and catch up. It is okay to have boundaries and to take care of yourself while you are getting adjusted to being sober. Your health is a priority.
I support you and I know you can do this. Keep moving forward.