*Update*
There is this "spamming reactions" to everything i'm posting, for so many days it's like he is obsessed. He send me a msg to see if i am okay, i answered i was good and he told me (after 1- 2 months of getting a job ) that he got pains in his back and he is in bed with pills ect for days so i wished him to get better soon. I don't trust him though. I can't view his actions so pure towards me. I bet he wont go to work anymore so he needs me. OR he WILL need me in the future so he is planning a come back.(financial issues, emotional stability, me taking care of him etc etc) I don't think he was worried about my health asking how am i doing. I don't think he is SO nice without a reason. And the reason always benefits him. I really need to hold on and not let my head thinks the "good side" of him, or that he is changed or that he loves me.
I don't want to think that he wants to be just friends. I already did that the previous time and it wasn't that. There was me and him get back together for a short time and then AGAIN he backs off.
Anyway, i really need to feel less alone in this.
Srsly i trully believe i did not cause any of this. It should not affect me but i've got some days that i just HAVE to remind myself who he is so i don't fall again.