New here
Hi,
I wasn't sure whether to post this here or on the Family and Friends of Substance Abusers forum - please move this post if it's in the wrong place.
My son is 23 years old. We've had problems with him throughout high school, but eventually he managed to graduate (by doing the bare minimum). During his senior year, I insisted that he make some plans for life after high school - last thing I wanted was to see him sitting around in our house, smoking weed ad doing nothing. Because he said he doesn't want to go to college, we gave him the options of getting a job and paying rent, learning a trade somewhere, or enlisting. Then he surprised us and actually enlisted. He's been through a tour in Iraq, got injured towards of the end of the deployment and ended up getting medically discharged.
Then he met this girl. She's pretty wild, very provocative, parties a lot and uses drugs and spends her time with some shady types. The last person we want around our son. But he decided he's in love with her and going to marry her. He basically admitted to me that they use drugs together, and he doesn't consider it a problem. I'm not sure what they're using, but considering his behavior I don't think it's just weed. They also fight like crazy sometimes, and police has been called to their place because they were throwing stuff and hitting each other.
I'm not sure where they're getting the money for it. They used to ask us for money a lot using all kinds of excuses until I realized they were probably just spending it on drugs and told my son to get a better job if he wants more money (she doesn't work). They stopped asking, but now it seems that they're not short on money. I just hope they don't do anything illegal for it.
What can I do to get my son out of this mess and at least push him in the right direction? He needs a life and a normal girlfriend who won't drag him down. He won't listen to us or to his Army friends who think the same way we do. Whenever I see him I see he's on something and it just breaks my heart.