I guess I'd also like to say the "program" doesn't just apply to people with extreme cases of trauma or outright physical abuse.. It's about our inner child, and as children our brains literally had not yet developed the intellectual capacity to understand why things happened or why we were treated certain ways. So a lot of the times the resentments we discount as too immature or minuscule to be relevant, are actually perfectly valid to that part of us.. denying this does us no good in the long run.
I think people raised in relatively healthy environments from the start feel "safe" with their inner child and thus usually develop the tools needed to intuitively navigate the uncertainties of adulthood. But some of us have to go back and do it more deliberately. If there were blockages in the healthy stages of development, those are the stages we need to go back to to ultimately move forward. Not by re-living them as our traumatized self (unless that's to release or acknowledge a natural emotion), but by learning to give ourselves now what we never had then.