Hmmm. I guess that’s the crux of the issue. I really don’t think I am romancing it. I’ve acknowledged all the HELL it came along with. And how much better my life is without it. But, I can’t lie to myself and say I never enjoyed myself, because that wouldn’t be true. I have to move forward as a sober person being honest with myself - that it came with a load of sheer hell, but evenings like I described above were fun. I mean, I think lots of stuff might be fun but not worth it. Lying out in the sun all day might be fun, but skin cancer isn’t worth it. So, I’m trying to be at peace with missing the few fun nights of drinking so that I get ALL the positives that come along with sobriety. But I don’t think that means I have to pretend I didn’t enjoy myself at times. I know there are some alcoholics that really don’t enjoy themselves ever. But there are some that do. I wish I was part of the group that came to hate it. I just came to hate 99.9% of it.