even if he agreed to testing after a period of supposed clean time and the test came up dirty, he is almost guaranteed to DENY the results. test is faulty, walked past a poppy field, ate a poppy seed bagel.....partner to partner testing is rarely a successful, recovery building tool. it makes YOU the drug police.
any recovery that does not begin in the NOW but is instead put off for some future date is still active addiction. the more he takes, the more he feeds the beast.
so what happened when you brought up testing? he left. and i don't think he was returning library books. that he buys street drugs, he has contacts out there, and that involves all kinds of nefarious activities and players. in other words - bad news.
this is not something you can fix or change.
you didn't cause it.
you can't control it.
you can't cure it.
you CAN accept what IS. your husband is a drug addict. who is not quitting, regardless of what you say or want. he is taking the sole family car out on drug buys, where anything can happen. it's serious stuff. like it or not, he's also a criminal that just hasn't been caught yet.
you can circle his quit date on the calendar and then see what happens. assuming he misses that date - you then need to consider your options.