Where I am at the moment is a very dark place in my life – brought about by myself – due to the decisions I made over the years. Drinking just made it darker, but at least drinking made me forget – to a point. It made it easier to simply move reality onwards; (“Pour another drink and leave the problems for tomorrow…”) Of course, tomorrow became yet another tomorrow, and then another…
Then it was a month later, and then a year, and before I really realized, half-a-dozen years plus had gone… and the hole I found myself in years ago had gradually become a canyon. I say gradually and not suddenly. Because that’s the way alcohol works; it
gradually strips us of everything we have and hold dear: Family, friends, relationships, money, possessions, self- respect, pride… And it does it
slowly, ever so slowly… Because it savors the desperation it finds in us, it feeds on our despair and helps us dig the holes we are in ever deeper… Every day we drink and the longer we wait, our holes get deeper and the walls steeper, and the getting-out ever more difficult.
I’ve begun climbing 35 days (in three hours time) ago, and I’m starting to see some light at the top of my hole…
