Originally Posted by Surlyredhead

I tried to keep my "friends" while getting sober. You know where it got me......drunk. I had to let go of people, places and situations that were toxic to me. I could not stay sober any other way. Even when I thought I could help, someone with a lot more sober days that I had told me "The hand you hold out to help a person drowning in alcohol, might just be the hand that pulls you back down." Not one of us can get better without actually wanting to quit.

I know it is hard to let go, I am sure your friend is trying to hold on to her partying friend by sabotaging your sobriety. She might not be consciously doing it, but it sure sounds like she wants the old you. It is scary to see our old drinking friends get better, it makes us take a look at ourselves, the only way to feel better is to quit, or drag you back down. What you describe is a toxic relationship, not safe for you, especially early in sobriety. A year is fantastic, but it is still early. If you don't watch out for yourself, no one else will. The vacation has red flags all over it and I am sure you know that or you would not be questioning it.

Hugs, Cathy