I have never used cocaine, but other than that I could have written your post.
Step one:
He has got to go.
No you may not reconcile or have contact or a separation.
This was a bad choice. You will discover why you made this choice as you work on yourself and grow.
Put relationships on the back burner.
Your "pIcker" is broken and until youre well you will continue to attract D-bags and those with a boat load of their own problems.