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Old 11-27-2019, 04:55 PM
  # 42 (permalink)  
silentrun
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Join Date: Mar 2013
Location: St. Paul Minnesota
Posts: 4,359
Originally Posted by awuh1 View Post
Like yours Derringer, my spiritual experience came stone cold sober and followed a "cry out". I always feel so grateful to hear from others who have had similar experiences. I see these experiences as a response to an earnest, and urgent, request for help.

Though apart from the reality, at least as we are accustomed to experiencing it, the experience for me was more real than real while at the same time being for the most part ineffable.

Silentrun my experience also had that quality of connectedness . Thanks again, I'm grateful to you both.
Things had gotten really weird for me right about 9 months sober. I think I finally came out of my depression and was working my way through my issues. There was still one thing I couldn't forgive myself for because if I had it to do over I would still do the same thing. All of my other regrettable actions I would do differently so those were easy. The day this happened I was having a glorious day. I was just over a year sober and was driving 2 hours north to Duluth to go get my daughter from a sleepover she decided to bail on. It was early spring and sunny and the snow/ice on Lake Superior was the most brilliant turquoise I had ever seen. Every song that came on the radio seemed like a love song meant for me. The whole drive was sublime. I kept having this guilt invade my thoughts. I felt it deep. I cried out kind of like you guys did with my guilt of something that I'd do again. That's when I felt it pass over me and showed me I was looking at it all wrong. I felt this feeling of complete acceptance just as I was. Always was accepted just as I was, always will be. I think I connected to Mr. Rodgers.
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