Originally Posted by Wholesome
It was also the best work I've done. I couldn't let it go until I was willing to look at it, examine it, and separate what belongs to me from what doesn't. A lot of it didn't belong to me, but I carried it and punished myself for it because I was too scared to really unpack it and go through it.
This reminded me of something a Christian counsellor told me once. She was seeing an adult woman who had been sexually abused as a child by her uncle I think it was. She never told anyone, not even her mum, and it had happened some twenty years ago but she had carried a secret sense of shame and guilt for what had happened ever since. The counsellor prayed with her and asked God to remove her shame and place it where it properly belonged. Just a couple of days after this the uncle, who she had never seen as an adult, wrote to her saying that he had plagued by a huge sense of remorse and that he wanted to admit (for the first time) to what he had done and to apologise for it. Make of that as you will! It seems to me though to prove your point that we should not carry shame and guilt that come about from other people's actions.