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Old 11-10-2019, 11:32 AM
  # 9 (permalink)  
Rose335
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Join Date: Jun 2019
Posts: 689
I'm with August on this (people pleasing is my Olympic sport) and I think setting boundaries in the way Mantalady described is a good start to dealing with it. When I was at work - I'm retired now - I almost always took stuff on for no good reason. Entirely my own choice. Finally I learned to say something like 'I'm afraid I don't have the capacity right now' or 'I'll need to get back to you before I can confirm' etc etc. I don't think it was a part of my addiction to alcohol but I do think that the need to please was somehow obscurely related to why I did drink to excess. I can still feel slightly uncomfortable when I'm with friends who "can't" buy a bottle of wine with dinner any more because I'm not sharing a drink with them. But not so uncomfortable that I would ever let that jeopardise my plan for recovery so that's an improvement.
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