You'd be surprised how "in denial" an addict can be. For years, my ex had me thinking that his weed use was ok. (He was an alcoholic, near death many times but went to rehab for that particular madness). He remained unemployed for 4 years, because he could not pass a drug screen. This affected our relationship and in the end I left.
I don't think you can convince another person of the significance of their addiction. That "bottom" that they hit isn't necessarily what we would think the "bottom" is.
I don't want to repeat what others are saying, but you gotta take care of you. Changing the way you react and behave are the only control you have.. and when things are crazy it helps to remember that.
E