This, this, this!!! I hate to see people get their hopes in in dealing with a qualifiers family. It just rarely ever happens in any positive way, because normally they are just as sick as the addict with codependency or their own issues. Blood is thicker than water, always.
Huge, huge hugs.
Originally Posted by
TropicalWinter 
I totally hear you here. My ex's family is just as sick as he is. I too was just as sick when I drank the koolaid and was so incredibly codependent, but I have been working very hard on myself for many years.
The sooner you can totally, radically accept that this is who they are, the better off you'll be. I've gotten to the point where nothing surprises me anymore about Their behavior. My ex's mom bought a VERY nice house for my ex and his affair girlfriend, AFTER he showed up at my kids' school drunk to pick them up, and is now actively conspiring against me in the divorce process. And that's just the tip of the iceberg.
Listen to your lawyer, find support for yourself, and protect your kids. We're here for you.