It does make sense, Flips. I think it's good that you got a start; good way to sort of launch yourself into a spot where you decide to get some focus involved. As to whether to shampoo the carpet, my vote is "yes!" It sounds doable, it's visible, and it will feel good to have done something. (Says the woman who hasn't vacuumed in a month.)
I'm actually feeling quite a bit better since cutting down on the trazodone. Yesterday was just longggg. Went to work at 10, did the intake thing at IOP at 3, then was in group from 530-830, so didn't get home until 930ish. It felt good to quite ATS, and it felt right to be back at IOP. My favorite counselor will be my case manager and though we haggled about it a bit, we settled on a plan that's acceptable. Three nights/week for 2 weeks, then two nights/week for 2 weeks, then one week where I transition into Continuing Care (CC). I tried to get out of the last hour of "education," but that was a no-go. However, they've introduced some new stuff like acupuncture/meditation one night and on Fridays its now either AA or Refuge Recovery (actually Dharma Recovery because there was a schism, but same thing).
There's also been a shift in tone that I like a lot. Less emphasis on AA, more on building a program that works for you as an individual.
Whoops, time flies! I'm off to the gym now. Hopefully this anxiety I've been carrying with me all day will dissipate after that.
To be continued...