I read the Toxic Parents book long ago. I think it helped me put things in perspective and be at peace with my decision.
I, too, am the family scapegoat. And then of course, I'm told I'm crazy for thinking so and that I'm denying looking at myself honestly. Yeah, right.
It's been around ten years since I've had any real contact with my family and if it weren't for the fact they're working on my kids, I'd be 100% at peace with the decision.
One thing that helps me is what I used to tell my kids: When you stand at the pearly gates, God's not going to ask what anyone else did. It doesn't matter if you're religious or not. I live my life in a way that any rational person NOT being fed stories by my crazy parents will see that I lived well.
They've damaged my relationships with other people beyond my control, with the stories they tell. But so be it. I move on and find other people and over the years I finally realized that almost without fail, people who did NOT know my parents saw me entirely differently.
