Originally Posted by
trailmix 
hey teehee, good to hear from you! I too was worried, glad to hear you are doing well (as well as can be expected under the circumstances).
One other thing to kind of be aware of, while remorse without actions are just, words, as you refer to, I think it's important to also look at where that remorse is directed.
Is it remorse in feeling sorry for himself and the situation he finds himself in or is it remorse looking outward and seeing how he is hurting others.
So glad you are getting out in your community too and have been in touch with DV.
No, I don't think it is remorse because he feels sorry for himself. It is actually deeper than that. I think he thought with years of sobriety his behavior had changed, and from what i can gather, I believe it has significantly, but old habits can die hard. He knows what I went through with my 1st husband and I can see the concern that he has caused me similar anxiety and it is upsetting to him. That is all good and great, but like I said, words are cheap and I need to see action.
I'm just glad he is back at AA because I believe prior to this behavior becoming common place AA helped keep the ugly dry drunk and the myriad of bad behaviors at bay.
So, we will have date night dinner on Thursdays and then we each go to our respective meetings and then go home. I can handle that, I like dinner and I like him better when he's going to AA.
No rosy glasses here; I'm playing it safely by ear.