On Day 4, I’ve been reflecting on what drove me to sabotage my 2 and a half year sobriety. Yes, I listened to/enacted the AV’s missive, that drinking would make me feel better, deaden my despair.
But, at the same time, I also realised that drinking, would do no such thing, in fact make matters worse. So why the dissonance?
Yesterday, I noted a Newcomer mentioning the Freedom Model. Last year I posted in the sub-forum below ‘’Secular Exploration of Different Recovery Methods’ - the Freedom Model thread . SoI bumped it, then began re-reading, and reflected that ‘I’ had lost sight of the fact that alcohol holds no panacea, doesn’t make me happier. There must’ve been a residual conscious belief that alcohol ingestion held a positive for me.
Food for thought indeed, after my relapse.