everybody is running the show except YOU, buttons. unless you want what it currently happening to continue unabated, you HAVE to step up, set down RULES and BOUNDARIES. and have some type of enforceable agreement.
there is no way in hell i would have allowed my ex/not ex waltz into my dang house and present my daughter with ALCOHOL of any sort. just.....NO.
do you WANT him out of the house? do you want a formal separation that clearly divides the assets, severs the bonds and puts him on the outside looking in? you don't have to answer, but you should check your own motives.