Ahhhh, the confession. I had one myself tonight, although by comparison I really don't think you have much to be confessin!
I don't know how anyone of us could sit idly back and not f*** w/fate, when the outcome could be the worst-case scenario you mentioned. But of course it's out of your hands, even though I'm sure your letters will be taken into consideration and I don't think that's a bad thing. We will all continue to pray that the Beav has reached his bottom and that he will be able to seek help when he's released.
Hugs,
JG