Originally Posted by
Mango212 
Hi Wombaticus,
It takes what it takes to get us to move forward.
Walking away from my husband and using skills and support from Al-Anon groups and domestic violence help centers were huge things for me, experienced in growing support networks with growing confidence.
Has your husband ever been supportive, kind and a good person? Alcoholism doesn't discriminate.
hi Mango.
yes, he was supportive and encouraging but not always great with the kids.
interestingly, i have been having flashbacks about our early years whilst on holidays and kicking myself for not seeing the warning signs. I suppose it was reasonable to expect that he would grow up a bit once we started a family. Things have really only become bad in the last 5 years.
I had some news about a setback with some study i am doing a few weeks back which i told him about. His response: you chose it, sucks to be you.
I now choose to see his criticism or lack of support as reflective of his own state of being, rather than my problem. It takes a lot to get to that point, and not a sign of a healthy relationship. Still exhausting.