Originally Posted by
Tommyh 
how did you come to believe?
I still am..... and I do it by looking for where I don't believe rather than trying to convince myself that I totally already DO. When I have the humility to consider that maybe I don't believe, I find all sorts of patches of disbelief, mistrust, and lack of trust in God. I'm looking at my actions here - because my ego and false pride want me to believe ""Michael, you believe bro.... you're doing great." When I look at my actions though, I find my actions are often indicative of someone who doesn't really believe..... who doesn't reeeally have faith in God.
Looking for anxiety, fear, frustration, and anger are the easiest areas to consider first. Going a little further, ANY area of my life where I'm disturbed has also proved to be an area where my agnosticism is running in high gear.
As far as deciding to not be fearful, or deciding to just have more trust....... that sounds great but I have had very little success with self-willing my own spiritual maturation. What seems to work is I do the searching, I do the finding and then i openly discuss it - with my sponsor, with friends in AA, and at meetings. From there, I've found God provides the willingness to move past and/or out of those bad habits more often than not.