Mine is now saying that I am blaming the family dysfunction on him when I say that his alcoholism makes the kids disrespect him and exacerbates their oppositionality. And he sees no reason why he should even try to moderate his drinking. And I’m a “Puritan”. They can do such verbal gymnastics when they are confronted.
Originally Posted by
caroelle 
Hi Flower, I just received email notifications that this post has been updated and I now remember reading this post a couple years ago when you posted it. I remember thinking that you and I are living the same life. I never thought I would post on a forum such as this but I really find comfort in reading what you are going through because I'm going through the exact same thing.
Your AH and your relationship sounds exactly like mine. I learned about co-dependancy after finding this forum a couple of years ago and have been working at not trying to control him or his drinking. It's heartbreaking watching him from the sidelines. I just wish he could see how much better he is and how life could be if he just stopped drinking.
My husband isn't violent or abusive but he is annoying and obnoxious when he has been drinking and I stay with him because when he's sober, he's that person that I love again. I also have that hope every day that "today is the day...."
I hope you keep updating us here because as much as others are helping you with advice, you are also helping others by sharing.