Originally Posted by
Ariesagain 
This is an interesting question. If the Q doesn’t get reminded of the damage, is that protecting him from the consequences of his addiction?
I would think it’s one thing to continually bring it up, But given these circumstances, where he was asking for money to attend what probably would have been a drunk fest, isn’t it fair to say, “we are paying off the rehab bill right now”?
And the OP is allowed to be angry, no?
Yes I think the OP has a right to be angry that she is being asked for yet more money. And I am sure that she let her son know at the time he decided NOT to follow through with the suggested/planned treatment that she was going to be losing a lot of money. He knows what he did, he knows she is out all of that money, not sure continuing to remind him of that fact will do anything more than cause further distance and resentments.
I think the smarter and wiser thing is to simple just say no. Really no explanation is needed allow actions to speak louder then repeated words.