Originally Posted by
hummingbird358 
Just wish it wouldn't be so uneasy making conversation. Wish it would not be so traumatizing getting a call or text from my own child.
What are you really afraid of Hummingbird?
If you tell him the dog died he will have a raging bender relapse?
If you ask him how his sobriety is progressing he will resent you and tell you to mind your own business?
If you say the wrong thing, tell him about his grandpa he might decide to drink?
All of those things are possibilities. They are also things that you have zero control over. If he is going to drink he is going to drink, whether the dog died or he stubs his toe, he doesn't need a "real" reason, he is an alcoholic. He has either chosen to seek recovery or not.
All out of your control.
You have handed him all your power in the relationship, you are always on the back foot, fearful. Why? He's texting you for some trip he wants to take and you are living in fear and trepidation. Does this seem right to you?
Just as he has the option to not contact you, you also have the option to just let this go, not contact him, not even worry about him. He will do whatever he likes, which really has nothing to do with you.
How do you let it go? By doing it. Actions. If you are going to reply in text just text him like you would anyone, let the chips fall where they may.
It is no coincidence that you heard from him when he needs money. Yes, he will ask again.