Thank you for the comments! They have all helped.
I get sent out of town quite often and he takes the dogs while I am away. I would very much like to go no contact with him, but the doggies are stopping that from happening.
I texted him today and always feel stupid after I do because I didn’t HAVE to reach out to him. He didn’t need to know what I told him. I just don’t understand how he can be so aloof and such. The woman he was seeing apparently “played him like a fiddle” and was after money... just the fact that he is playing I don’t get. I cannot imagine seeing anyone right now I feel damaged and don’t feel ready to date at this point. He isn’t going to change I know that but it still hurts.
It just hurts sometimes more often than others. I know I did the right thing and actually took my doggies up to my camper yesterday and we spent the night up there. It was really fun and nice. And then I get back to my house where I have made a nice home for my babes (doggies) and I and I still reached out to him! Ugh, what the heck is wrong with me!?!?