nez

My heart goes out to anyone suffering from alcoholism. It leads to dark places and robs souls. Alcoholism can without a doubt be fatal, but it doesn't have to be. That comes down to the individual.

I wish that I could magically end all the suffering that alcoholism causes, but then I have to remember "WTH do I know anyway?"

For years, Iknew! I knew the way my life should go. I knew what you should do. I knew what was best for the universe. That marvelous thinking qualified me for my seat at this keyboard. Staying in this seat required me to learn "WTH do I know anyway?"

I suffered from alcoholism. My loved ones suffered from my alcoholism. Even people that didn't directly know me suffered from my alcoholism. If my alcoholism had been fatal to me, my suffering probably would have ended (but I don't know). If my alcoholism had been fatal to me, the suffering my loved ones felt from my alcoholism probably would have increased.

There was a lot of suffering that wasn't go to manically go away. While suffering is a devastating and horrible experience, much good came out of it though. While I am truly sorry for any suffering that I have caused to others, my past suffering is my strongest ally and reminder for my recovery. It brought me to today and I am extremely grateful for my today. The past suffering experienced from my alcoholism didn't magically go away for myself or others, but it is being amended, healed, strengthening bonds, and providing lessons for the future.

I can't explain a lot of the hows and whys as the universe unfolds, but more will be revealed if I am receptive and stay away from "I know".