Originally Posted by
murrill 
I'm very new to this incarnation of recovery. It has been a bit of trial and error for a few months, but today was a good one. I made the mistake of quitting my anxiety med (Buspar) about a month ago: Very unpleasant outcome--through-the-roof anxiety--but I learned just how much of it lurks beneath. I resumed medication plus another one (Latuda), and I still take Wellbutrin. I've been feeling better, although at first, I had what was most likely a period of hypomania. Therapy helps. I recommitted to the basics this week: Drink water, three meals daily with plenty of protein, mindfulness meditation, exercise. It helps to be on this forum. I want a relationship with food that is not about dieting or bingeing or restricting. No judgment: Food is neutral. I'm tired of thinking about it all the time.
Thanks for the post, Murrill. I've been there myself. I also find I feel better from meds and get worse when I try to go off of them. I also had what may have been hypomania when I went off of a low dose SSRI that shouldn't have effected me that way, but it did. I'm sensitive to meds.
I like how you're committing to basics like that. I need to do that. Is that something you decided to do on your own, or with your therapist?
What type of mindfulness meditation and exercise do you do?
I've been where you are with regards to food. I do find that if I keep my food very simple, and eat 3 structured healthy meals and snacks, that I feel better. I also do well when I don't go too extreme with eating healthy, which can lead to my being OCD about food. I feel better mentally when I eat well, but it's not a cure. I eat treats in moderation when I feel like it, and I try to catch myself if I'm eating too many treats, or if I'm becoming obsessive with eating too healthy.
It's great that you're able to think of food without judgement and neutral. I can easily obsess about food until it becomes addictive thinking. When I think of food as just food, I do better with it. Did you ever try OA? Personally I didn't like OA because it was too extreme for me. I don't think I have the physical allergy to food like people in OA do. But I think it's cool that they treat food like alcohol for the people who need that. For me I guess I have the mental obsession with food but not the physical allergy to my trigger foods. It's cool to talk about this stuff on SR. I don't see it often brought up.
Best wishes to you and thank you for your input here.
