An issue for me with my emotionally abusive family of origin was infantilization combined with parentizing.
Info about these and steps for recovery, in regards to emotional abuse:
With infantization the child's decisions are manipulated by the parent so the child will not reach autonomy. The parent can also manipulate the child (or adult child) into believing they are unworthy by having very high and unrealistic expectations to which they cannot possibly perform.
Everything about this behavior is to keep the child orbiting around the parent ensuring henor she does not have a life of their own.
More often than not an Emotional Abuser will use both strategies, making their victim take parental responsibility while at the same time not ever treating them like an adult. Parentification and infantalization are simply strategies to make the victim feel both responsible for the (emotional) well-being of the abuser and make sure they believe themselves incapable of independence. Combining the strategies ensures that the victim becomes and stays entangled with their abuser.
Recovery is about you getting to decide for once how the dynamics of the relationship are going to work and getting a chance to put your own comfort and mental health in the forefront of the relationship.
What happens when you do that, especially if you haven’t done it before, is they are not going to like it. You need to be prepared for that. They will push back, and you have to steady yourself and stand firm.