trailmix

Tinkerbeau, you've had a rough time. We all have negative thoughts about ourselves from time to time, but they are not worth repeating.

You are not a "fat ugly blob" nor are you a "sad, lonely loser".

I used to talk negatively to myself like that, I used to read and hear people say - oh don't be so hard on yourself, hey what if you starting being nice to yourself? What if you didn't speak to yourself so harshly?

You know what, I blew that off, it sounded so airy fairy.

Well one day I caught myself doing it - again - and I stopped and thought. Why DO you talk to yourself like that? You would never in a million years think that about anyone else and you sure wouldn't ever say something like that to them, so what ARE you doing exactly?

You know what, I don't know why I was doing it (and I really don't care at this point) but I stopped doing it. It does make a difference and it really does have a negative affect on you when you allow it. Whatever I was telling myself just wasn't true and I'm pretty darn sure what you are telling yourself isn't true either.

How about instead of being so hard on yourself you do something nice for yourself to give yourself a boost? How about a manicure or pedicure, how about a haircut, new makeup, a new shirt - if those aren't in the budget, bubble baths, foot bath, some home concoction for a face mask. Do your nails.

Now if this seems simplistic, well that's because it is that simple. When you look in the mirror, don't criticize yourself, tell yourself you are ok just the way you are (because you are!) Instead of being so mean to yourself, be nice to yourself, you deserve it.

Sorry for the long ramble : )