FallenAngelina
Thank you for responding.
Me feeling betrayed and lack of trust, is a recent revelation on my part after really thinking hard how things have gotten to where they are. I've been reflecting on why I have not communicated well with her the past few years, why things have gotten to where they are, and I'm starting with myself and how I feel and act. In doing so, I realized this went back way farther than I ever thought. It's like a light bulb going on, realizing I havent trusted her or felt like we had intimacy since that time since those things, and everything since then has just been a manifestation of that. I'm not 100% sold on that, but that is where I am at today.