Originally Posted by
trailmix 
Depression and anxiety don't make you seem "crazy". It's so important to level with your therapist, she cant give you the tools you need if you don't.
There is light at the end of this tunnel, things will get better. Calling 911 isn't dramatic by the way, it's just reaching out for help when you need it. Sometimes when we are alone in our heads we can make things seem more dramatic than they are, you know what I mean? Well if I call them and they show up and take me to the ER then what if this and what if that. Remember how kind the people at the maternity ward were. Remember how scared you were beforehand? They helped you, that's what they do and they are happy to do it, this is kind of the same thing really.
Sometimes I think about admitting my feelings completely to someone who can help me. Lately I have felt more helpless than I care to admit but,I wanna change how I am. I just don’t know how. Parenting comes so easy for some women but for me it has been a nightmare. I look at my son and I love him so much but,I have so many unpleasant feelings surrounding him. His dad. How alone I am. How overwhelmed I am. I haven’t bonded with him... I feel horrible. I’m still recovering from childbirth and some days I just wanna lay in a quiet room alone for a while. But I can’t because I have to be a parent. I have to be there for my son and I am barely making it. What happens when my mom won’t help me anymore? I panic...because I cannot do this on my own. It’s bad. My anxiety is awful. I’m hoping therapy gives me tools to help me better control my anxiety,it’s ruining my life.