Originally Posted by Cody11

Hi iris. I sent you a private message last week as I can completely relate to what is going on with you right now.

I have two sons and my youngest son was born on my first sons birthday. I had left their dad 7 weeks before he was born as things were so bad and I was very unhappy. I'd moved back to my mum and dad's for 3 weeks then managed to get my flat.

Anyhow, when my youngest was born, I was very depressed and completely overwhelmed. My oldest son had been so easy to take care of but my youngest had colic and to this day, the cries of a newborn baby make me shiver. When I was in the hospital I knew I didn't want to take him home. I just felt it was all too much.

It was on the second day we were home that I phoned my mum and dad and told them, I didn't want my son. My dad phoned the hospital and spoke to a midwife I had gotten on well with and she advised him what to do. My GP came out and spoke to all of us. I was lucky in that my mum had retired and she came and sat with me every day, my dad coming in at lunch-time. My sister moved in with me so she was there at night. Night time just seemed the worst time with baby. However, it wasn't so they could take over his care - they'd help out of course to give me a break but I still had to be the main carer.

This maybe went on for three or four weeks but I knew I had to develop a routine and get used to being on my own. I joined a group that got me out the house, speaking with other mums and that really helped. As my son got older, his colic stopped and so things got easier. I also remember there was a volunteer organisation where someone came to the house to sit with baby if you needed a break. I didn't actually use this as my family were very good at giving me a break.

I know this is overwhelming and you are probably feeling like doing the things that are being suggested to you is a huge effort but please try to do something every day to get the help you're needing. Doing this and being productive will actually make you feel better - honestly.

Your little boy will grow so quickly and you'll soon be able to interact with him. It is hard, and when there is so much going on in your head, it sometimes seems, it's never going to get better but it does and it will - but please ask for help.

I have been a single parent for years - my son's will be 25 and 26 in may. Their father was never that involved and still shows very little interest. I look back and can't quite believe how quickly it's all gone. I got through it and you will too. Please keep us updated.