You got it. Time does not cure and hope will only go so far. I'm guilty of the samething to an extent. Family politics prolonged things along with making them worse too many times. If you have a choice chose to change or leave. Over a decade with no progress? Things will only get worse.
Sounds like this alcoholic is waiting for the proverbial bottom, for many it takes more than financial issues, duis, divorces etc. It takes a combination and/or timing of events and circumstances which is about as probably as hitting the lottery for many.
You did your time, 14 years too many.
If you exit the relationship and situation just be safe, assume or account for possible repercussions.
Good Luck