detox is a short 3 or so day period of time where the individual is supervised during withdrawal.
rehab/treatment is the longer and much more expensive component.
i'd say if three trips in six months didn't do it, then a 4th trip in 7 isn't going to either. the SOLUTION is the same.....don't drink, no matter what, and use all the tools and resources to prevent relapse.
let's worry just a little less about HER. the universe has been circling around her and her "problems" long enough. let her figure some stuff out on her own. if she's a big enough gal to flirt/cheat/drink etc, then she can hike up her big girl panties and start fighting for her own sobriety.
you must bring your focus back to you and the kids and re-creating a sane safe happy homelife. without the trainwreck in the living room.