To save the trouble of browsing through my old posts - got sober in 2014, several detoxes. A year later got pregnant, lost my mom to cancer during pregnancy. The baby arrived safely, but I relapsed hard when he was 1.3y old (including 3 weeks inpatient rehab).
Got out of rehab, still some struggle but I promised myself that making it to 90 days sober will make a huge difference. It did! On 90th I found out I was pregnant again! So planned and prayed for!
But now that the second baby is 5 months I have relapsed again....
I am a primary caregiver not only to two young children but also to my grandma whose health declined rapidly in October.
Confesed to my husband that I have been drinking today. He didn’t buy it.. he knows it’s been 2 weeks, not only today.
With all the sky-high anxiety (seeing a doc, I am prescribed medication, does not really work anymore) I am at loss.
I need to stop but I am deep down into my cravings and self medicating for anxiety
Husband will leave me and take the kiddos if I don’t quit..