All my moderating attempts led to the same old behavior every time. I wanted so much to be able to just have 'a few', enjoy the relaxed feeling - but I always ended up drunk & stupid. I wasted so many years. I'm glad you can admit you've proven as a couple there is no moderation. When you first quit you'll feel a little disoriented - allow yourself time to adjust to a new way of living - things get so much better. No more regrets or guilt.