Originally Posted by DriGuy
Originally Posted by WaterOx View Post
CRRHCC you're the first one I've heard use the word "control" the way I always thought about alcohol. I've often used that word and it seemed like a lot of people couldn't relate. They'd always stress that alcohol was used to lose control.
As crazy as it seems, I always felt the opposite. Thanks for clarifying that for me
It was certainly true in my case with alcohol. There were a number of reasons I should quit, but the most compelling, the one that really pissed me off when I first tried to control it, was the realization that I could not, all the while convincing myself that I just liked to drink. I could best describe it as being "fiercely annoyed" by becoming aware of that. Knowing that a mere physical substance was controlling my behavior was the single most important motivator that got me on the road to seriously getting help. That led naturally, although at first begrudgingly, to abstinence.
The operative word is, "Control." When circumstances in life are perceived as overwhelming we have learned to regain control of our emotions (how we feel) with mood changers and quick fixes. We need to recognize our feelings, reframe our thinking and replace the temporary quick fixes with other high value behaviors that we find important. The ladder is often the hard part. We all need to find values and purpose in life besides drinking and drugging our feelings in order to regain control! It's not rocket science. We need to see the forest through the trees.