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Old 01-10-2019, 08:08 AM
  # 28 (permalink)  
Hats
Member
 
Join Date: Sep 2017
Location: Leduc, Ab
Posts: 758
I like this topic, It reminds me of where I was 501 days ago. The emotions & feelings I felt in the 1st month were absolutely horrendous and terrifying. Thank god for my sponsor who helped me through it as I didn't have a clue on how to handle them. The biggest issue I had was the anxiety and panic attacks, they were so bad and I worked myself up over every little thing, I felt hopeless and all my problems I conjured up in my head made me feel like there was no way out. I was in such mental & emotional pain I almost admitted myself to the hospital... After getting through a few weeks, I remember a lot of crying. I would break down and cry constantly. Once again, thank god for my sponsor and others that helped me through it. Today when I look back, all that anxiety, fear & tension was a combination of withdrawal and distorted thinking. The crying, they wear tears of healing, from years of built up emotions that I kept inside and dumped alcohol in me to keep them there. Once I made it through that life seemed to improve very quickly, day by day I got better, felt better, thinking clearer and started to develop some hope. I found a god of my understanding and started into the 12 steps with the help of my sponsor.
Long story short, the beginning was a nightmare followed by a light at the end of the tunnel with hope.
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