LPS, as you said, you know your options. ExH sounds like a psycho, so it makes sense to concentrate on that first.
I'm appalled your AH wants to detox at home when you have this on your plate. Are you really up to monitoring him and coping with a seizure which could happen any time over several days? From your current situation, I would say not in a million....
You don't want to be told your options re getting yourself out of this, but there will only be limited ways to reduce stress while the situation remains. I myself had to make some hard choices to remove myself and even then it took years to heal.
You've done what you can re ex for now. You really don't need your living situation getting worse by have an A detox in your home and you caring for him.