Sidekick, the guilt feeling after having the drink to "chase the blues away" will be far worse than the strongest urge to drink. Staying strong will help you through the tough times ahead. Praying for you and your mom. When the addictive voice gets loud try to change the thought pattern by doing something, any thing to get your mind elsewhere. Do the dishes, sweep the floor laundry walk the dog, (if you have one). Anything that will fill your mind with different thoughts. Do you have a friend or sponsor to call at times like this?