Who they really are...
Over the years, myself included, hundreds of people here have posted about their alcoholics, when sober, being great, loving, kind and funny people when they are sober and that's "who they really are."
And, if they'd just stop drinking, they'd be "who they really are" all the time.
The truth is, and I was very slow to this, who they really are is somebody who chooses to drink knowing they will become the selfish, narcissistic, destructive, dangerous, and horrible people they become. In that moment when they decide to take that first drink, for whatever reason, THAT IS WHEN THEY DEMONSTRATE AND BECOME "WHO THEY REALLY ARE."
To believe anything else in the face of repeated behaviors to the contrary is simply insanity.
WHO THEY REALLY ARE IS AN ALCOHOLIC, and there are only two kinds of alcoholics in my opinion-- the ones who are drinking and the ones who are not. Every time I hear people parse drinking alcoholics into groups (functioning, real, severe, mild, binging, etc,) I want to puke. THEY ARE ALL ALCOHOLICS-- who gives a **** what kind? Does that change anything? At all?
Kudos to each and every alcoholic who has found a way to not have that first drink, and who has found a way to change "who they really are" into a sober person. You prove it can be done. Thank you to each and every one of you.