I think your connection to your step son is from a healthy distance. Obviously you care about him, you think about him, maybe pray for him and you inquire about his well being with stepdaughter. I think given the circumstances with your stepson you are doing the best you can.
The nicest place to be is in someone’s thoughts. The safest place to be is in someone’s prayers.
I think given the circumstances with your stepson you are doing the best you can. I’m sure your late husband understands that more today than he ever did before.