sarahknight

Hello all. Probably like many of you, I am here because abusing alcohol is not working for my life. I am a married, working mother of three children between the ages of two and eight.

I've spent the last 10 years turning to alcohol to avoid my feelings, to forget my pain and sometimes just because I was bored. I've made a lot of changes to my life recently so I can be healthier and happier. In addition to changing my job, returning to church and dieting and exercise, I've been trying to cut alcohol out of my life.

After I was raped two years ago, I started using alcohol almost every day off and on. I think I was drinking at least a bottle of wine - maybe two on the days I could get away with it. My drinking has caused problems in my marriage and my eldest is starting to understand what is going on.

Over the last month, I was able to go two weeks without drinking then one, then another one. While I've been proud of that progress, what I am doing is still not healthy because I know I'm doing it so I don't have to deal with my feelings.

So you're probably thinking...has this woman tried therapy? Yes, in fact, I was in therapy for a year. I made a lot of progress - it's the reason I made some tough life changes. But I hit a wall. It seemed like my therapist and I covered all of the topics I am capable of talking about face to face with another person even though I know there is a lot more to cover.

I thought if I found a truly anonymous place to chat with people who understand this addiction, perhaps we could help each other.

I am so grateful there is a place like this to talk and I'm looking forward to growing here and maybe helping others too.