Thank you so much for feedback Delilah.
Last night we had another discussion, because about three weeks ago he said “this is not working for me“.
He said there is something wrong with the relationship if I don’t move forward and want to live together. Since we have dated 3.5 years. He wants a promise ( as I did say I’d live with him after the kids are done with high school—but that’s when I was drinking). Because of the length of time and because I’m hesitant he feels I’m effing him around.
For me, there are there things that come into play that I’m afraid of besides having been married three times before.
He has a little tiny dog, that used to eat at the table and used to sleep in his bed and to sleep in his bed when I am not at his house. But I grew up on a farm and dogs weren’t meant to be in the kitchen eating at the table or in our beds around the furniture no matter what size they were . I’m not saying his way is wrong or that licking his dog on the lips is wrong it’s just the way a lot of people enmesh with their dogs these days . I get it, I totally get it. Dogs do not disappoint they are your friends no matter what and they greet you with the best of greetings when you get home from work or from wherever you were .
The other thing is his ex-wife. She takes him to court for everything and in my country in the United States, if there is alimony still being paid out which it is for three more years, she can go after my money as well. His adult children’s most of them even though they are passed college still ask him for money but he still pays for all of their medical bills and their insurance premiums. The insurance premiums are court ordered, but one of his children are 25 years old has a profession of her own and now she is billing him the cost from her employer every month even though she can well afford it on her own. His son also wanted him at 63 years old to cosign for him another graduate school loan. And he did finally put his foot down and say no. I think the kids don’t like me because no one wants their parent to be with someone else unless I’m mistaken. But it sure would be nice to date someone who’s kids at least are friendly to me . I must say the youngest one did text me a happy birthday wish earlier this month which was very nice .
Anyone out there who is a dog lover who is in love with a non-dog lover, or has a second or third marriage and all the baggage that comes with it ( mean ex spouses and adult children) who either feel successful or not successful in their marriage/relationship—can you please respond and give me some input too?