I am caught up in a relationship with a dry drunk - been going with him for a year and a half. I am 3 yrs. sober and working the AA program, regularly going to meetings, etc. He is 18 years abstinent and claims that I'm only a "baby" in sobriety compared to his many years of not drinking alcohol. However, he has never worked the steps .. has never gone to meetings (except when he was ordered to by the law 18 yrs. ago), never done a 4th & 5th, doesn't ever own up to any of his behaviors - temper tantrums - blaming - name calling - finger pointing, etc. I recognize his behaviors as the same behaviors I exhibited when actively using alcohol ... and they are coming from him towards me - so, in a way, I understand them. And because I understand them, I want to control them!!! Help!!