Hi Gerard
congrats on 9 weeks . It seems like a lifetime in many ways... but in another way its 63 days ...
Still pretty early in the unfolding ribbon of the rest of your life.
Though I do wonder if I can drink socially in future.
its my belief that if anyone's drinking has bought them to a place like SR, then it vital they accept
they cannot control their drinking and never will.
I thought it all - I thought I could master my drinking by only drinking socially and when that proved too embarassing I thought I could master it by drinking only drinking alone.
Nope.
I thought I could master it by limiting it to weekends, and then to to at least Wednesdays with Monday and Tuesday off - at least for a while until my life got better.
Nope.
I thought I could control it by learning all about my addiction and what ,made me that way. I thought the wisdom of others on the net, forums, libraries and such might fill me and stop the desire in me for self destruction.
Nope.
I was willing to give just about every thing up...except drinking - that should have been a pointer to my problem,
No amount of time reset me.
No amount of time away from drinking taught me what a normal relationship to drinking is.
I have never known what that is.
I confused abstinence for control many many many times.
They are not the same thing - not ever.
Be smarter than me, Gerard - fight those persuasive thoughts.
D