Sophie11 - 4 months is AWESOME!! i am sober around same time right now...Sorry to hear all the things that happened. Try to let go things, sometimes they are not in your control, drinking over that or any reason is not going to help. It sounds so simple but I have learnt that very hard way. Pick up your self and be easy on yourself. Trust me, if I can do you can definitely do or You can do even better. Stay strong, Stay committed and don't budge to that dark voice. You are much more stronger than you think....
Good luck...